Mama Told Me There'd Be Days Like These

She just didn't tell me they'd suck this hard.

The Mariners managed squeaked out a series win over the weekend against the A's bringing hope to their fans. Going into their series with Texas sweep looked very possible. The 1-2 punch of Felix and Bedard was set the shut down the always high powered Texas offense when cruel fate stepped in.

Felix came down with a mean case of the swine flu and was not himself last night. Not himself in the sense that he was throwing a large amount of breaking balls and k'ing Texans like he was the second coming of Santa Anna. Keeping with my Alamo simile, just as Santa Anna killed many Texans he also stretched himself too thin and the army took a heavy toll, Felix k'ed many batters but when a Ranger did manage to make contact the ball left the park. Felix may never throw a breaking ball again after this terrible outing. That he won't is a travesty because those are his best pitches.

Today Erik Bedard took the mound to face the Rangers. He had hoped to pitch well and help the team out of the park early for some arbitrary drinking day Cinco De Mayo festivities. Pitch well he did, giving up only 1 run through seven innings. Too bad for him the run support failed to show up. Vincente Padilla sent out a notice to the M's bat's telling them the game had been canceled and that there was a team meeting at Peso's instead.

The fact that the offense struggled against a RHP is nothing new. Dave over at USSM wrote an article a few days ago talking about this glaring weakness. The gist of the post was that the M's need power left hand bats like David Hasslehoff needs rehab. Without anyone in the line-up to make RHPs worry fans will see many more games like these even against terrible pitchers like Padilla. As Dave pointed out

You know how I keep harping on the roster being too right-handed and how it’s costing us wins?

Padilla, career vs RHB: .241/.300/.370
Padilla, career vs LHB: .299/.381/.484

The Mariners are starting seven right-handed bats and two left-handed bats today

There is one in-house option that could possibly destroy the foul beast of RHP like the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch. His name is Jeff Clement. Many people, including I, lamented Clement's demotion at the beginning of the season. Few foresaw the lack of a daily dose of Jeff in the line-up would be the factor that would cause the center not to hold. Yet here The M's stand defeated after being 1(!!!!!!!) hit against a very pedestrian Vincente Padilla.

There is no good reason for Clement to languish in the purgatory of AAA. His defense can't be any worse than that of Rob Johnson. His bat, however, would be a YUGE upgrade. Even if Clement continued to move like a retarded rhino behind the plate his bat would more than make up the difference. I know Jeff has done some unknown and unforgivable sin but now is not the time to hold a grudge, Zduriencik.

M's fans will have to sit through many more games like the one today if some action is not taken to remedy the lack of lefties on the roster. I for one would like not to endure such punishment. Can we please have the shiny new toy of a power LH bat? We needs it so bad!